Last week while on my lunch break, I was having the usual conversation with co-worker girlfriend about how there just aren’t any men that I am interested. I exclaimed, “Men, today, don’t seem spiritual enough. They’re not motivated enough. There really aren’t that many attractive men anymore. MEN TODAY JUST AREN’T DOING IT FOR ME!” In response, my friend caught me guard with, “Then its time for you to try women.”
For a moment I forgot who I was talking to. My coworker is a lesbian goddess. She’s one of those women whose natural beauty makes it hard for hetero-women not to stare. She’s certainly not the type of women I’d generally “peg” to be lesbian (as stereotypical as it sounds, we all know the type I’m talking about). To take it one step further, I have to constantly remind myself that her best-friend/roommate is…her wife (legally according to Connecticut state law). Even as I write this blog, she is marching in Brooklyn’s Gay Pride Parade.
Disclaimer: Nothing about her lifestyle bothers me. But her statement did: Then its time for you to try women. The only thing I could say was “GA-ROSE” (that’s my long drawn out way of saying gross). I begin to give her a long list of why I would never “try” a woman. “First of all, I’m not attracted to breasts. Women are far too hormonal, and …”, well I have my other reasons.
Nevertheless, this got me to thinking. Are there women out there who are claiming to be lesbian simply because they can’t find a good man? Is a women the next best thing to man? Have single women become so impatient with men that they are willing to try women? What does God think about this?
Why does a woman who “tries” another woman have to claim lesbianism? Maybe it’s time we reject all of these labels and free ourselves to love anyone that we connect with on a spiritual and sexual level. God is love afterall, yes?
While I am not sure she has to “claim” lesbianism, the act of trying demonstrates lesbian behavior (assuming “tries” refers to having sex). Now, if “tries” does not refer to having sex then most women prefer to “free ourselves to love” — this is just good-old-fashion-friendship. Truth be told most women love and are attracted to their females friends out of human nature (but most “heterosexual” women wont’ admit to this). If “tries” refers to having sex, as a child of God, I am less concerned with labeling myself but more concerned about my behavior. And as all of us know, trying to have sex for the first time with a women (or man) is not an act of love, but more an act of curiosity. My point…If you try it you’re not necessarily a lesbian, but you do engage in lesbian behavior